The Reagan Pregnancy Test (for textbooks)

by Larry Tate on September 17, 2008

I encountered a book at my local Barnes and Nobel today entitled 48 Liberal Lies About American History: (That You Probably Learned in School) by one professor Larry Schweikart of the University of Dayton (no, not Tennessee — Ohio).

It was a fascinating read.

Did you know, for instance, that Columbus didn’t kill any Indians? And that the Puritans weren’t the theocratic haters of Indians that they’re made out to be? In fact, they actually used the surplus agriculture they got from their capitalistic farming practices to aid the “hapless” Indians. A Thanksgiving/Free Market miracle! Those stories of genocidal campaigns are just absurd chimeras cooked up by “arugula-eating, pointy-headed-professor types” and Obama voters who hate America.

One of my favorite chapters is the story of how Iraq’s Weapons of Mass Destruction actually were in Iraq before the war. Schweikart’s explanation of how they were all whisked away, right before US troops arrived, is a real tour de force. Oh, and Saddam Hussein? Completely in league with al-Qaeda.

Basically, everything you (and virtually all really smart people) know about American history is wrong. Unless, of course, that thing you believe is an hallucination that casts conservatives in a positive light. Then it’s true.

I know what you’re thinking. You’re thinking: “Ok, Larry, but how do I know what books to buy? I don’t want my child to encounter the evil falsehoods of liberalism. I don’t have a Ph.D! How do I know which books have lies and which books don’t?”

Have no fear. Larry has a simple, easy to remember test: the Reagan Pregnancy Textbook Test. Parents, watch this video, and learn:

Incidentally, it’s always good to hear an historian say, “well, I had to stretch that one.”

UPDATE:

You can learn more about this intrepid iconoclast at the University of Dayton’s website. I learned, for example, that prior to the academy Larry “was a rock drummer for several bands, one of which reached the big-time concert level as the opening act for Steppenwolf . . .”

Larry also says that his “future plans include winning a Pulitzer and writing a history of media bias in the United States.”

I can’t wait.

{ 4 comments… read them below or add one }

Dr. Metal September 18, 2008 at 4:34 AM

Wow, that dude has tenure. Totally sweet.

Reply

Larry Tate September 18, 2008 at 7:12 AM

I just can’t figure out why there is a colon in the title:

48 Liberal Lies About American History: (That You Probably Learned in School)

WTF?

Reply

Ed Webster April 10, 2010 at 12:33 PM

I see this book designed for the “smart people” who back up their beliefs with things that get in the way such as “facts” “evidence” “proof”.

Nothing in your blog disproves the chapter on WMD’s. True sign of liberal mainstream tactics that distract by poking fun instead of diving into the evidence presented. Oh, the new era of enlightened liberals…hearts full of compassion and intelligence to surpass any conservative. This is why to make the liberal system work, they have to rewrite history to create the “evil empire” of American prosperity.

Smart people know when they are duped. And yes, the text books are liberal slanted as well as the professors who teach the trash. Funny thing, liberal history does not have a leg to stand on. After reading this book, my desire was not to take Larry’s word on it, but to prove or disprove his facts …and I did the homework on it and found he was key on. Let me ask, how much research did you do? Lets hear your answers debunking what he said?

About Columbus and the Indians…. go on believing the lies. People who seek truth will find it. Those out to impose agenda’s will form what they want to believe.

You may be able to fool some of the people with this rhetoric, but you will not fool most. Only the arrogance of todays liberal students will support you.

Reply

Larry Tate April 11, 2010 at 2:48 PM

Smart people know when they are duped?

Let me get this straight. You think that Saddam Hussein had WMD and somehow made them evaporate without a trace right before the US troops arrived? And it is further your contention that no Indians were enslaved or killed by viceroy Columbus in the Caribbean? And you are saying that I’m not interested in “evidence” or “facts”? Read Las Casas’ eyewitness account: History of the Indies. Or, just read Columbus’ own journals. I’m sure you’ll find some “facts” there that will challenge your notions about the man. On WMD, why not read the IAEA’s reports on their inspections of Iraq (which found no trace). Or Hanz Blix’s remarks before the UN. Or the Duelfer report, performed for the CIA by the ISG. Only someone utterly blinded by ideology could fail to accept and understand one of the most well-sourced and thoroughly proven facts of the past decade: there were no WMD in Iraq. Heck, even George Bush and Dick Cheney finally admitted that they were wrong about WMD. The president lied to us into a war. But you can’t deal with that. So break out the pixie dust and buy a book that is so laughable and pathetic that it amounts to academic misconduct.

I would be very excited to hear about the research and evidence you have examined which disproves my understanding. In fact, so would every reporter from here to Baghdad. Send it along in another comment; I’ll be happy to read it. In fact, I’m make an entirely new post about it. Who knows, I might win a Pulitzer for the biggest story of the year.

Reply

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